September 21, 2007 - part 2

End of my birthday...ah well. Thank you to those of you who emailed and posted here. You made my day. I wish...oh I wish there would have been 200 notes from strangers saying that I've touched someone I don't know. But I am very happy with the two or three people I have heard from. Each person who thinks about our kids even once...is a victory to me!

I'd love to tell you I painted the town red, ate like it was my job, and still lost 5 lbs. I'd love to tell you that...but I'd be the fattest liar this side of the Mississippi! No...ate a sensible and typically stinky breakfast - and indulged more than I should have at dinner. Afraid to see what my nemesis, the scale, will say the next few days...

One of my admitted food-passions in life is take-out Chinese. OOOOOOHHHHH...the smell and crunch of a good crab rangoon.....OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I'm telling you - its nearly an out-of-body experience for me. Figure in my abiding love for Sesame Chicken, Hunan Beef, General Tso and his army of tasty tidbits...and you can imagine why the local Chinese place at our old house knew us by name. (seriously, we probably financed at least one of their cars) I tell myself that, in the grand scheme of things, Chinese isn't as bad as other options. I know, I'm delusional. But its soooooooo gooood.

Well, my deluded, dieting, decrepitly old self let go of the reins a bit too far tonight, I'm afraid. I did sidestep the rice, but I oh-so-didn't remotely attempt to bypass the rangoon. You have to understand...rangoon doesn't just call my name. It walks across the table, pries my lips open, and leaps to its delicious demise. Its not my fault! (work with me, its my birthday rant)

In the interest of full disclosure - I also had more than a dalliance with some Sesame Chicken and some delectable veggies that had been stir-fried in what could only be described as heaven's sauce. Translation - I ate chicken and veggies that were so coated in ooey good crap - I'm sure their nutritional value reached negative status. Fishfarts.

On a more positive note, I was gifted rather amazingly. My 3 girls all made me jewelry. Number 1 daughter made me a fabulous red glass bead and bali silver necklace with an amazing glass pendant. Daughter 2 went crazy with purple beads and made me another wonderful necklace - complete with a "big girl" glass focus bead that her sister gave her. Daughter 3 was not to be outdone, and made her first "grown up" bracelet, complete with a real clasp fastened on by big sissy. No mom has ever been fancier. Even though there is overly ample amounts of me to go around, extra chins cannot function as extra necks. I'm actually short in the neck department. I could use 2 or 3 more to be able to wear all of my finery at once.

Then there's my poor mis-guided hubby. After years of not shopping until the last day, he finally listened to more than two decades of tirades. He went and shopped early. He not only purchased early...he made thoughtful, meaningful choices - taking my personal loves and interests to heart. He bought a gift card to a favorite restaurant - that I haven't been to in over two years (we have 4 kids - one with health issues - going "out" is not an expression we can wrap our brains around!), and a gift card to my favorite self-indulgence - Jo-Ann fabric. Sounds like a weary wife's dream-come-true, doesn't it?

Yes, yes, it would have been...if it weren't for this damned diet. Here I sat, eating my smelly onion eggs that my oldest daughter suffered horribly to make - and admiring my new finery. Then my wonderful, thoughtful, hubby presents me with his mushy, beautiful card and his oh-so-planned-out gift. I'm nearly a puddle of appreciation just reading the front of the card. Then...I opened it. Mind you, I'm hungry. I'm cranky. And thanks to my weekend of stress-induced debauchery...I'm still in anti-carb fueled cravings from Hades. So, what do I see as I open my flowery, poetic birthday card? A gift card to...(wait for it)........
the CHEESECAKE FACTORY!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't remember much of the rest of the day. My brain imploded and I blacked out.

Better luck next year.

- Alicia - the Crazy Cancer Mom who aged to the area called "Middle" today. Ack.