September 30, 2007

OK, blog...blog like you've never blogged before. I have 10 minutes to the end of the news, and the arrival of a hubby and tiny hungry man to my sanctum sanctorum (better known as my hurricane-regularly-hits-it-bedroom/office/school room) So I may rant slightly off-kilter this evening...I'm on a time crunch.

Well, today is the end of Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. How many stories did you see on the news? How much Britney barf were you inundated with? See my point? How many "gold ribbon" products did you find in your local toy stores, children's clothing sections, or school aisles? Oh....you mean you didn't even know that pediatric cancer had a color? Yeah...me neither - until my daughter had been in treatment for over a year! Folks, I believe we have a bit of a PR problem.

I'd been contemplating this crazy Fat-A-Thon idea for months, before taking the sacrificial plunge. I chose to start the insanity this month - for an obvious, close-to-my-heart reason. I want someone, anyone, out there in cyber space to sit up and take notice! Our kids count!!! Our kids are suffering, fighting, and damn-you-cancer dying...and far, far too few people recognize that. I'm rather fed up with that.

Moms in our on-line group created a beautiful, moving, truthful video for this month. 60,000 people have watch it. This video tells the story of every cancer child - with raw honesty. It could change the world - if we could figure out how to get people to watch it. An uber-funny brilliant comedienne has a video with her singing perhaps the best ditty about mothers ever written. Its downright hysterical - no arguments here. Its been viewed over a million times. Do I remotely denigrate her? Nope. She's a hoot. Problem is, getting those same million to give a fig and a holler about our kids.

So here I sit. Eating healthy crap and writing oddball monologues about my masochism. Maybe, just maybe, if I can make people laugh, I can eventually make them sit up and take notice too. I may be the oddest duck diving in the pond...I could care less about publicity for me. I figure, if I can get someone to notice the Fat-A-Thon - then I can sneak in the cancer stuff. Asking directly, begging, and even the pity angle haven't worked a boatload so far. The way I see it, the only avenue left is humor.

Are our kids serious? Hmmm, let's see. Do bears, deer, raccoons, and the occasional eagle fart in the forest? Duh........ Are our *KIDS* also funny? Oh yeah. Have you ever met a 2 year old who wasn't? You haven't laughed until you've heard the shrieks from a 24 yr old nurse who's, again, been scared stiff by an ornery 12 yo patient hiding in a linen closet. 4 year olds may not skateboard well, but they can pole surf at near warp speeds. Our kids are KIDS first - they just happen to be patients in their spare time.

Have I made you laugh this month? Have you seen parts of your own round rear in my posts? Good! That makes me happy. Want to thrill my socks off? Share. Share my Blubber Blog, share my thoughts, share my mission...and maybe, someone new will share my passion. I don't want to weep for the empty arms of another mother. I feel their aching...its almost more than my heart can bear.

I want to feel the joy of end-of-treatment parties. I want to celebrate the glorious work of dedicated researchers - as they find new miracle cures. I want to sing from the highest rooftops and dance on the biggest stage...our kids matter!! Our kids count! If the universe is listening, next September 30, I'll be writing you about what a magical month it was. We'll be discussing last week's story on Good Morning America and last night's story on CBS Evening News. We'll be arguing over which story was better presented, and which network seemed more committed, rather than bemoaning the fact that no one seemed to care at all. We have 11 months, my friends. We can knock on doors, ring phones, and electronically stalk everyone in the media until they hear us.

Listen, if I can starve publicly, how hard can it be for you to share? Write to Oprah, Rachel Ray, Ellen, The Tonight Show, Good Morning America...I don't care who! But email your internet brains out. At least if they think I'm nuts - they'll talk about me or to me...and we can start the real dialogue...the important one...cancer kids.

As for the actual Fat-A-Thon, I've won and lost several battles this month. I started this quest at a whopping 258 pounds. At my lowest, I was 244 pounds. Then, a new medical disaster fell on my beautiful daughter's tiny shoulders - and stress began gnawing at my resolve. Over a weekend get-a-way at a cabin - I gained 3 .5 pounds back. I fought hard, and removed them a second time. Then...well, the news got a little worse AND it was my 40th birthday...and I rather lost my head. This time, I gained 4 pounds back - all the way back up to 248. As of today, September 30, I have solidly lost 3 of those elusive pounds again. For two days now, I've been 245 pounds. I count that as -13 pounds in my first month on the diet. Would I have preferred -20? Are you insane?!!! I would have been ecstatic! But, -13 is nothing to sneeze at - and its even been under an element of duress.

To those of you who are joining me by reading these mind meanderings...THANK YOU. I cling to your warm comments like floating doughnuts in a torrential sea of Koolaid. Knowing that I have to be honest with you...keeps me honest with myself. By the by...the whole "honesty" game is highly over-rated. I am, personally, finding accountability to be a major drag. I look at that lovely, whole-grain loaf of Panera bread in my fridge...and hear you all gasping if I eat it. I don't know how you've managed it...but you're making an honest woman out of a perpetual pudge fabricator. You may very well all be psychics in the making.

Let's use those unnerving powers for good...let's pester the pantaloons off of some media folks until someone caves and listens! Until then, I send you all a fruit-loopy queenly wave and a squishy-seat bummy wiggle.

Pickle lips and frog farts. Stop taking life so darn serious and embrace a smile!

- Alicia - the Crazy Cancer Mom - losing weight, and my mind, for cancer kids http://www.crazycancermom.com/

Breakfast: 2 eggs, 1 oz cheddar cheese, 1/2 C onions, 2 TBS real bacon bits, 2 C coffee w/creamer

Lunch: We attended the Survivor's Picnic with our hospital. You will hear this often and repeatedly...I LOVE our hospital staff! I love spending time with them, I love them as humans as much as I do as medical people. They are kind, funny, silly people - and all of them make this happenstance world a better place. I ate chicken fingers covered in delectable bread crispy stuff. I drank water.

Dinner: buttered popcorn and a diet coke. Too busy trying to find my room under mountains of laundry to be bothered to make anything. Hubby's gourmet popcorn had to suffice.

PS - I LOVE our Heme-Onc staff!! And this took 1 hour to write, not 10 minutes. Good thing little man was pooped from fun in the sun! ;-)